163. Reclaim Your Time by Setting Simple Tech Boundaries

Episode Transcript

Courtney Baker:
No, we’re going to do this right now. We’re starting the episode right now.

Blake Stratton:
Okay.

Courtney Baker:
Everybody, pull out your phone.

Blake Stratton:
Yes.

Courtney Baker:
Listeners, you can do this too if you want to join.

Blake Stratton:
Well, I guess this is for my computer. I pulled up the screen time app.

Nick Jaworski:
Oh, I didn’t even know that existed.

Courtney Baker:
Perfect.

Nick Jaworski:
That’s exciting.

Courtney Baker:
Okay, so I’ve got mine up.

Blake Stratton:
Yeah.

Courtney Baker:
Nick, are you ready?

Nick Jaworski:
I’m very good-

Courtney Baker:
Who do we think is going to have it up? I think it is Nick. Nick is definitely going to have it [inaudible 00:00:25].

Nick Jaworski:
I think it is-

Blake Stratton:
Oh, I’m definitely going to have you all beat.

Courtney Baker:
You do? You think so?

Blake Stratton:
Well, I use some apps where I leave my phone…

Nick Jaworski:
Yes.

Blake Stratton:
My phone doesn’t have auto lock and I use some apps that are like timer apps or other things, or there’s this really highly productive…

Courtney Baker:
Oh, okay. Well, I’ll go first.

Blake Stratton:
There’s a new productivity app I use where the screen has to stay on, it’s called TikTok, and you can’t close the screen. Because otherwise your brain…

Nick Jaworski:
Right, otherwise you don’t get the stuff, yeah.

Courtney Baker:
Yeah, that’s right.

Blake Stratton:
Yeah, so I have a direct IV of dopamine into my brain and that’s how I get that. So that’s the exception.

Courtney Baker:
Okay. Great. Okay, so you’re going to win. I’ll go ahead and go because I bet mine is probably lower. I have minus three hours and 17 minute daily average.

Nick Jaworski:
Oh. Okay, great. I feel much better.

Blake Stratton:
That’s nothing. That’s nothing.

Nick Jaworski:
So usually, Blake, I would have a higher amount than this, but currently my daily average is three. It just went up, it was 3:18, now it’s 3:19. No, but it’s usually higher than that. So I don’t know what happened there. But I do use apps that run. Sometimes I’ll watch, I’ll listen to YouTube videos while I run actually, so that’ll give you an hour. Not to brag, I’m out there for an hour. So that can impact it. Blake, what do you have?

Blake Stratton:
I have… Well, I think it’s four hours and 14 minutes.

Nick Jaworski:
Okay, these are not as bad as they could be.

Blake Stratton:
I think. Yeah.

Nick Jaworski:
Let’s not underestimate how long. Even we’re like, “Oh, it’s only three hours a day.” And just think about, if you’re awake for 16 hours, and three of those hours or four of those hours is your screen is on…

Courtney Baker:
Listen, we need to have more screen time because they need to be listening to our podcast.

Nick Jaworski:
I [inaudible 00:02:16] to a podcast-

Blake Stratton:
Who listens to a podcast with the screen on?

Courtney Baker:
I do.

Blake Stratton:
What? You just watch the progress bar? Just stare at the static buttons of fast forward 15 seconds [inaudible 00:02:28]?

Nick Jaworski:
Okay, everyone’s allowed 20 to 30 minutes to focus on this on YouTube a week. So I’ll give you that.

Courtney Baker:
Okay. Perfect.

Nick Jaworski:
But it’s still so much time, and I know that for a lot of people the number is higher.

Courtney Baker:
It is a lot.

Nick Jaworski:
There have been weeks where it has been much higher for me. So it’s no shame out there in the world, but I think that most people don’t know their time, or actively avoid knowing the time, because it’s a little horrifying. I mean, you think about it, three hours a day is how many hours a week? What, 21? It’s almost a day of your week is with the screen on.

Courtney Baker:
That is a lot. Well, and I think it’s really interesting when you look into your most used. Two hours of mine is on messages. I’m really popular. And it’s not from you two texting me, that’s for sure.

Blake Stratton:
Must be nice to have friends. Nice brag, nice brag.

Courtney Baker:
I’m just kidding.

Nick Jaworski:
No. Hey, I texted you several times yesterday.

Courtney Baker:
Yes, Nick and I, we do text.

Nick Jaworski:
See? I’m doing it.

Courtney Baker:
That’s true, we’re friends.

Blake Stratton:
Cool. Sounds great, guys. I’ll let you guys just finish the podcast here. I’ll go back to my productivity apps. I’ll go watch some podcasts on my podcast app, just stare at some [inaudible 00:03:42].

Courtney Baker:
I am curious, we’re talking about our phones today and technology and how it works with our productivity, either for the good or for the bad. So I’m curious, because neither of yours are like astronomically high, I’ve heard much higher, but do you feel like your phone is just another appendage?

Blake Stratton:
Yes, absolutely. And depending on the appendage, maybe more valuable than some of the normal ones. I mean, could I live without my pinky on my left hand for a few days? Probably. But could I live without my phone for a few days? Oh, it’s debatable.

Courtney Baker:
Yeah. It’s at the point now that I basically own an Apple watch just to find my phone. When people ask about my Apple watch, I’m like, “I love it. I can find my phone so easy.” I feel like that’s kind of the sign that maybe this thing has become an appendage. And it is an interesting thing to talk about.

Blake Stratton:
Isn’t that what an Apple watch is? You’re literally just wearing a phone on your hand.

Courtney Baker:
Yeah, you are. But you don’t use it as a phone very often because it’s not great as a phone or at text messaging or a lot of other things, but you know that it’s fantastic at pinging your phone.

Blake Stratton:
Helping you find your other screens, yeah.

Courtney Baker:
Yes, helping me find my other one. Yeah, I think it’s interesting to talk about how do we… We’re talking about productivity, how we get the most out of our time, and I think this is a really important thing to talk about because it is an appendage. We are highly connected, and so how do we set boundaries well to help us get the most out of our phones?

Blake Stratton:
That’s right. So today we’ll talk through three boundaries you can set to foster greater productivity.

Courtney Baker:
Welcome to another episode of Focus on This, the most productive podcast on the internet, so you can banish distractions, get the right stuff done and finally start loving Mondays. I’m Courtney Baker, here with the dancing Blake Stratton. How are you?

Blake Stratton:
I’m great.

Courtney Baker:
I mean happy Monday. I’m supposed to-

Blake Stratton:
Happy Monday.

Courtney Baker:
Verbs always says happy Monday.

Blake Stratton:
Thank you.

Courtney Baker:
Happy Monday.

Blake Stratton:
Happy Monday unto you. That makes our podcast sound a little cultish. It’s like, “Oh, we have to,” or, “Here’s our greeting, happy Monday,” right? And then I say, “And a happy Monday unto you,” right? And we bow, we have the ceremonial bow.

Courtney Baker:
Yes.

Blake Stratton:
Yep.

Courtney Baker:
Yes. Because that’s what we’re going for.

Blake Stratton:
That’s how it works here. So we’re talking about technology and boundaries around technology. So you thought, “Hey, let’s have Blake back on the podcast so he can tell us how much time he wastes on his phone. We can help him out.” So this is very much the finger pointed at myself because I know I could use some help with this. Courtney, the first boundary of three that we’ll talk about is time.
Time. So we just talked about finding out, first and foremost, how much time you actually spend on your phone. If you’re wondering if you should set a time boundary around your screen time, look at how much time you actually spend. Not how much time it feels like you spend, but how much time you actually spend. It’s amazing what real data, how that will make you feel versus just your general feeling. At least when I looked at mine I was like, “Whoa, hey, that’s a lot of time.” So how do we set a boundary around the time?

Courtney Baker:
Well, one thing… I think I learned this from one of you, I can’t remember, but you can set time limits around individual apps. I had no idea that this was a thing. And I had found there are some tools that… Like I mentioned earlier, I spend a lot of time on messaging, and certainly there could be some boundaries that I want to set on that. But usually it’s the apps for me, like Instagram, where I’m not connecting with, usually, people here; I’m really just filling time or just zoning out for a while. And certainly there are moments where we all need that, it’s not like that’s a terrible thing, but I don’t want that to get out of control.
And so I don’t know who to give credit to, somebody taught me this recently, and I set my Instagram time, it was Nick, to 15 minutes. And it’s actually a really helpful tool because it comes up once you’ve hit 15 minutes and nine out of 10 times I am like, “How have I spent 15 minutes on Instagram?” And there are certainly times where you can actually say, “Hey, give me 15 more minutes,” or, “Today, I’m going to be sitting at a doctor’s office all day and so just don’t worry about telling me the limit today.” So there’s certainly ways to make this boundary work for you.
But it’s been incredibly helpful and, really, a lot easier than I thought. Just having the awareness was like, “Oh yeah, why don’t I open my Kindle app and read a book instead.” That’s still screen time, but it’s screen time that is more intentional. It’s something that I want results from. So that’s one way. One way you can set a boundary is with these individual apps.

Nick Jaworski:
So I’ll say that I first heard about someone doing this from, of course, none other than Mr. Productivity himself, Michael Hyatt. And back then, I don’t remember what apps he was using it for, but he actually had set up a password around the additional time element, so you can add time or not. And then I think he may have told his wife Gail or somebody else, and he didn’t know the password. And so if you’re really trying to break the habit of how much time you’re spending, there are ways to really force yourself.
And Courtney, 15 minutes on Instagram, now that there’s 15 minutes, don’t you find that you’re more focused on Instagram? That’s how I feel about Twitter. I have 10 minutes on Twitter, and I’m like, in, out.

Courtney Baker:
Yeah.

Nick Jaworski:
I do the same thing with our 13-year-old. He has an old iPhone of mine that he uses to message his friends and listen to Spotify, and I’m like, “You’re getting 10, 15 minutes a day of messaging, period.” And so at first he was like, “This is not enough time.” And I go, “You got to be more efficient with your time.”

Courtney Baker:
Were you like, “I have a podcast for you to listen to”?

Nick Jaworski:
Well, yes. And he was like, “What’s a podcast?” And so it’s really interesting how once you know that’s there, and I’ve fallen into it, where you get really used to sometimes clicking the 15 more minutes thing. So once that happens, you really need to start checking yourself and going, “Okay, is there really a problem here?”

Courtney Baker:
Right.

Nick Jaworski:
Nothing wrong with these social media platforms, although I do think there’s lots of problems with them, but a controlled space and a controlled amount of time is definitely the way to go.

Courtney Baker:
Yeah, absolutely. I mean, I want people to hear, this is not like what you should do. I’m not saying you should only have 15 minutes on Instagram. It’s thinking intentionally about the boundary you want to have, what your personal goals are, vision for yourself, and trying to set these boundaries to help you realize that. And so that, for me, has been a really helpful tool.

Blake Stratton:
Something else you could try is just setting a boundary around the time of day that you use your phone. So a simple one is, “I don’t want to use my phone at the dinner table, so I’ll leave it in the other room,” or, “I’m not going to use my phone before 8:00 AM or after 7:00 PM,” or something like that. That’s been helpful for me in terms of getting my mornings off to a good start or getting the evenings or just having better conversation at the dinner table. So that’s a simple one you can start as well,

Courtney Baker:
I have a hack for this, but is there actually a tool that does this on the phone?

Nick Jaworski:
Yes.

Courtney Baker:
Really?

Nick Jaworski:
The screen time can also do this for you.

Courtney Baker:
What I do is actually have sleep mode start much earlier than I’m actually going to sleep, because sometimes it’s just the pinging or the text… Obviously I spend a few minutes on texting…. So that’s not going off at a certain time. And it’s earlier than when I would start my evening ritual so that I’ve got some time where I’m just not as distracted as I normally would be.

Blake Stratton:
So building off of that time boundary, the second boundary you can set around your screen time, your technology, is space. Are there spaces where you want to be unplugged, where you want to intentionally set a device aside or not have screen time? So think about, maybe it’s at the dinner table, you want to engage with your family, let’s just have no phones at the dinner table, or when you’re in the bedroom, or in your car, or at work. There could be different contexts, in other words, that are the boundary around your technology.

Courtney Baker:
I think this is really helpful. I would also just add to those examples because I find myself, even on a walk, I would bring my phone and check my phone. I know this is not a technology tool that I’m about to reference, and I’ve already given it a hard time on this podcast, but if you have an Apple watch that has cellular, your cell… Why’d that sounds so weird? Did that sound weird to y’all?

Nick Jaworski:
Cellular, is that right?

Blake Stratton:
Cell, cell, cellular.

Courtney Baker:
Cell-

Blake Stratton:
It’s pronounced cellumah.

Courtney Baker:
Yeah. If you have a watch that has cellular, you can leave your phone at home. Again, this watch is not very good at doing many things. And so it’s just like, can somebody contact you in an emergency? But it’s even those things like a walk that I tend to still bring my phone, still checking things. And so it’s that intention of having a moment for myself, that boundary gets blurred.

Blake Stratton:
And let me just interject here. We spend a lot of time on our screens. We didn’t really touch on, well, why does it matter? Why does it matter? Hey, you’re going on a walk anyway, it’s not like you’re getting work done, why not bring your phone with?
And to me, I would just say there is so much value in boredom or in blankness of your mental head space. So one of the spaces that probably most of us, unless I guess you have an Apple watch, then maybe you could still do this. But I don’t have any screens when I am taking a shower, and it’s no coincidence… It even happened yesterday. I had the best idea I’ve had in a couple of weeks just when I was taking a shower. And it’s no coincidence. And my mind is being occupied with the mundaneness of I’m not really thinking about anything and there’s no messages to check or notifications coming through. And that’s why I take about 90-minute showers every day so I can have plenty of non-screen time productivity.

Nick Jaworski:
But isn’t it crazy that that’s even a space that we’ve introduced screens to? It really is an insane concept that we take for granted that, yeah, I can just have my phone in the shower if I want, not a big deal. That’s insane, to just accept as our reality. So I’ve done it. I’m not casting diversions…

Blake Stratton:
I’ve never put it to the test.

Nick Jaworski:
Oh, I’ve done it, for sure.

Blake Stratton:
I’ve never put it to the test. I don’t trust the splashproof. I’ve ruined too many devices. I’ve had too many phones in rice in yesteryear.

Courtney Baker:
I will admit that I have 100% taken my phone into the shower to listen to podcasts.

Nick Jaworski:
What?

Blake Stratton:
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Courtney Baker:
I just want to keep the vibe.

Blake Stratton:
And to watch the podcast app.

Nick Jaworski:
Yeah, so she just stands in the shower, looks at the time.

Courtney Baker:
Yeah. If it’s a really good podcast…

Blake Stratton:
You’re scrubbing.

Courtney Baker:
Yeah, yes.

Blake Stratton:
Plus your phone can double as a little sponge if you can’t… You can just [inaudible 00:16:49] some soap on there.

Courtney Baker:
Yeah, exactly.

Nick Jaworski:
[inaudible 00:16:49] exfoliated.

Blake Stratton:
Wow. Okay. Well, I guess I took that for granted, that we didn’t bring our phones in the shower with that example. But my point is, space… Nick, you get this as a musician and as a teacher. Music is not notes; music is notes and space. And productivity works that same way, where it’s not just what you’re doing, it’s also the space that you leave for yourself. And so if all your day is filled with things, doing things or consuming things, and there’s no empty space, you are really doing yourself a disservice because the space is where your brain can do all this background work and put together ideas. And you’re probably more brilliant than you realize simply because you’ve crowded out the space with screens.

Nick Jaworski:
There’s a book I referenced on this show, I think a few months ago, that I was reading with my son called Learning How to Learn, and they talk specifically about the importance of what she calls diffuse mode and being able to take all these ideas we have. It’s a passive thing you have to do. You these ideas in the shower, while you’re walking, while you’re running, just that they sit in the background. If you don’t give your brain any time to do that, you just won’t have those thoughts. That’s like straight up science everybody. It’s science.

Courtney Baker:
Our third boundary is activity. So we’ve kind of referenced some of these, but maybe you want or need to have your phone on hand, but you want to limit particular activities. So you can try focus mode on the iPhone. I am going to guess that Android has that option, and I’m not sure anyone on this podcast is going to be able to answer that.

Blake Stratton:
We’re not willing to do a Google search before we record this podcast. That’s how disinterested we are in the Android platform. Sorry, I know. I have some hardcore Android users in my coaching group and, if they’re listening to this, they’re shaking their head at me.

Courtney Baker:
I know, I know.

Blake Stratton:
John and Sarah, you know who you are. No sympathy.

Nick Jaworski:
Apparently there is something on Android. It is called focus mode. So there you go.

Courtney Baker:
Wow, crazy. Okay, so you-

Blake Stratton:
$10 says Apple stole it from Android, but claims that it was the first [inaudible 00:19:17].

Nick Jaworski:
Yes, for sure. Yep.

Courtney Baker:
Yes. It probably was. 100%. So the idea here is to write out your commitment, things like, “I will not text or check email during meetings.” Or, going back to our last boundary, it might be something like, “I will not listen to a podcast on my way to work.” Just to have that space where you’re not having any input, your brain is just able to wander. “I will not check my work email outside of the workday.”
I talked about this recently on the podcast and then had several people in the Full Focus Planner community message me about this, but I do not have an email app on my phone. I’ve deleted that. And so the only way for me to check my email on my phone is to go into Safari, log into my email. I’ve made it very difficult. But commitments like this are really helpful to kind of put a boundary around the activity.

Blake Stratton:
Yeah. One last tip here. If you’re struggling with using your phone, a lot at times you don’t want to be using it, this is where rituals can be helpful. I recently revamped my morning and my workday startup ritual. A new quarter, let’s take a look at these things. And whenever I do that, I input them into an app on my phone.
Now, I know this is still, technically I’m using my phone, but hear me out. Because I’m using that and I have these new activities, I recognize that, “Oh, I…” I looked up and I was like, “Oh, I’ve been awake for three and a half hours and I haven’t gone on social media or checked my email or done anything.” But I haven’t had to resist that either, it’s taken no willpower, because I’ve filled that space with intentional activities that lend themselves to not using my phone.
And so that’s a way to use activity as well as a boundary is to say, “Okay, great. I have a ritual.” It’s an evening ritual, it’s a workday startup ritual. It’s a time where I can do focus work. And that will require less willpower from you to just say, “No, Instagram, don’t come at me.” You don’t have to exercise that muscle and it’ll be easier for you.

Courtney Baker:
So today’s tip to level up your focus is to just look at how much time you’re using your phone and experiment with it. Take one of these boundaries around technology and try it out. It’s an experiment, and see what it does to your focus and productivity.

Blake Stratton:
Thanks for joining us on Focus on This.

Courtney Baker:
This is the most productive podcast on the internet, so share it with your friends and don’t forget to join our Full Focus Planner community on Facebook. We’ll be back next Monday with another great episode. Until then, stay focused.

Blake Stratton:
Stay focused.

Nick Jaworski:
The snaps are back, everybody. Snaps [inaudible 00:22:29].

Blake Stratton:
Yeah.