SUMMER REPLAY: Helpline: How to Make Progress on “Off” Days

Episode Transcript

[00:00:00] Marissa: If you found us recently, welcome. We’re so excited that you’re here, and we’ve got some good news. So summer is the perfect time to actually go backwards.

[00:00:15] Joel: Like hit rewind. We are playing, that is to say we are replaying, some of our favorite episodes while we are on hiatus. So think of this maybe as like the starter kit for you.

[00:00:28] Marissa: Yeah, and the truth is that you don’t have to start at any specific point. We try to create all of our episodes as really standalone episodes. This next one that you’re about to hear is gonna be perfect no matter if this is your first Focus on This episode or maybe your 25th.

[00:00:45] Joel: We’re glad you’re here, and we hope you stay for the replay.

[00:00:48] We’ll see you soon

[00:00:54] Verbs: Welcome to another episode of Focus On This, the most productive podcast on the internet so you can banish distractions, get the right stuff done, and finally start loving Mondays. I’m Verbs, here with Courtney Baker and Blake Stratton. Once again, happy Monday to you both. Happy Monday.

[00:01:13] Courtney: Happy Monday to

[00:01:14] Blake: you, good sir.

[00:01:15] Courtney: Woo. I was getting a little, like, dance moves in there before we got going. I didn’t know

[00:01:19] Verbs: if you were on the Peloton there or if you were just-

[00:01:22] Courtney: I, I got this, guys. I got… So I got a new standup desk, and I have one of those, like, balance boards, like, so you can go back and forth. Yeah. And it is, like, strangely entertaining.

[00:01:34] So I apologize at the front of this podcast if I have too much energy for you. Let’s blame it on the standup desk. I recommend it for all the people.

[00:01:45] Verbs: Freedom Blake, this is normally where you chime in, so I’ll just, I’ll pass it to you.

[00:01:52] Blake: Oh, right, right. Um- Like you’re

[00:01:54] Courtney: recording a podcast. Uh…

[00:01:57] Blake: Funny, funny quip.

[00:01:58] Funny quip.

[00:02:02] Courtney: And this, we talk about this all the time. We talk about this more offline than online, but that I laugh at your jokes, like, so much, even when I try not to. I listen to the podcast and I think, “Oh, my gosh, stop laughing. It’s not that funny. Stop laughing.” And Blake, I will make a joke, and Virbs and Nick, our producer, will both laugh, so I know it’s funny.

[00:02:23] It’s two out of three, okay? It’s funny. Blake looks at me with just, like, straight deadpan, you know. Look, you’re welcome, Blake. I’m, I’m gonna try to hold back this episode. Listen. I’m gonna try to rein it in. Hold the laughs.

[00:02:37] Blake: Okay. Okay, cool. So that’ll be my challenge. I like having a little challenge every episode.

[00:02:42] Oh. It helps, helps me stay on my toes. Okay, great.

[00:02:45] Courtney: Let’s do it.

[00:02:46] Verbs: Yeah, ’cause as you say, stay on your toes, there’s some days where you just aren’t on your toes, and-

[00:02:52] Courtney: True …

[00:02:52] Verbs: those are kind of referred to commonly as your off days. Not like you’re on paid time, leave, or anything like that. Boom.

[00:02:59] Courtney: Oh.

[00:02:59] Blake: Master.

[00:03:00] Verbs: This, this is the transitio- transition of the century right here.

[00:03:03] These

[00:03:03] Blake: transitions, what would we do?

[00:03:05] Verbs: But, uh…

[00:03:06] Blake: That was the Star Wars of podcast transitions just then. All

[00:03:11] Verbs: right. So guys, today we’re talking about off days. Not your paid time off off days, or just checking out of work for a couple of days, but days where you actually just don’t feel like you’re on your toes.

[00:03:21] You’re not on it at all. But have either one of you recently… I mean, obviously times have been crazy, but have you recently experienced a day to where you just felt like it was hard to show up for work and get stuff done? Courtney, I see that hand.

[00:03:36] Courtney: Yeah. Uh, last week, I kid you not, it was, like, perfect timing for this podcast.

[00:03:41] Chase and I, after the night was over, we looked at each other, my husband Chase, and said, “Uh, did the kids just unite against us?” You know, like the forces, they were like, “Let’s do this. Let’s show the parents what we’re made of.” And our, our youngest, who is an incredible sleeper, eight month old, um- She was awake the first half of the night with a runny nose, you know, so all that stuff, like steam showers, you name it.

[00:04:10] Like, we tried it. Have fun. Hmm. So yeah, it was great. Awesome. So then we’re like finally like, “Oh, we’re gonna go back to sleep. It’s gonna be amazing.” And then our five-year-old had nightmares the whole second half of the night. I literally, at the end of the night, my husband and I looked at each other and we’re like, “Legitimately, how much sleep did we get?”

[00:04:28] And we were like, “Probably two hours.” I mean, it was a train wreck. Hmm. And so the next day, I had a coaching session, uh, like a four-hour coaching session, um, and then I had an executive team meeting that day, and I- On the same day. Wow … literally felt like I was floating. Do y’all ever feel like that? Like, you know when you just have not had enough sleep that you’re kinda like, “I kinda feel like I’m on cold medicine over here.”

[00:04:52] Um, that was my most recent off night. It was like a week ago.

[00:04:57] Verbs: Blake, what about you?

[00:05:00] Blake: Oh, boy. You know, there was this time in 2008, you know, the economic crisis. I think I had a… got in a bad mood once. Um- I laughed again. No. Does it, does it count- Yeah … if you’re sick? ‘Cause I got s- I’ve gotten like two- Yeah … I feel like I’ve had like two colds this summer somehow.

[00:05:20] But, um, it’s always, i- you know, where you feel like, especially ’cause we’re all equipped to work from home, it’s like, “Well, I can work, you know, but I’m not gonna go out and, you know, start shaking hands with everybody or anything.” But, like, I can be online and do it, but you just don’t feel… You feel out of it.

[00:05:39] No, another time, I think recently, um, was an off day was just maybe off in terms of productivity, but being really ex- kind of, uh, when you come back from vacation, but you feel like that vacation time, eh, could’ve been maybe one or two more- … months, uh, longer than what it was. Um, I mean days. Uh, um, and you go, “Oh, yeah, like I’ve gotta- Mm-hmm

[00:06:08] gear back in and, and, and slide back in,” and I, I’m sorta out of touch with the rhythm of work ’cause I’ve been away for, you know, five or six days or something like that. So that was, you know, last month for me was a few of those, both sick and coming back from vacation.

[00:06:25] Verbs: Yeah. Yeah, I mean, amazingly and somehow, you know, your work just doesn’t disappear because you’re having an off day.

[00:06:31] That’s just the fact of the matter. And it’s not exact science, but today we’re gonna walk you through four tips for what to do when you’re experiencing those off days.

[00:06:47] Courtney: So the first tip is to start with small wins. And, you know, we talk about this a lot about momentum. And, you know, when you feel off, everything is a little harder. I mean, you know, if you’re floating around feeling like you’re on cold medicine it is, it is harder. Um, and we talk about this a lot with goal setting that, you know, you kinda wanna start, set the bar low, like so low that you, like, trip over it.

[00:07:15] Like, getting started is so easy, and that same principle, you know, can be applied when you’re having an off day.

[00:07:22] Marissa: Mm-hmm. You

[00:07:22] Courtney: know, what you don’t wanna do is, is go try to tackle that massive project that you’ve been putting off, uh, for a month, because it is so hard. Uh, most likely what would happen if you did that is you would just give up and go, go to sleep.

[00:07:38] Or, you know, you just, you would fail. Um, so what you’re really looking for is something easy. So that might look like, hey, just setting your big three for the day. Uh, especially if you’re in the habit of doing that, it’s probably gonna be pretty, um, habitual. It’s probably gonna be something easy for you to do.

[00:07:56] Um, maybe respond to the most important email in your inbox. You know, it’s an easy task for you to do. Maybe mark off one task that’s been, you know, nagging you for a while but isn’t, like, that huge project that I was referring to earlier. So the idea is not really to get pulled into low leverage work, but really just to give yourself some, like, it’s a little bit of stretching, if you will- Mm-hmm

[00:08:21] um, to get rolling and get a little bit of momentum as you get into your day. So what about you two? How do you set, uh, small wins early in the day?

[00:08:31] Blake: So I don’t wanna step all over our next tip. I’ll kind of allude to it. You talked about habits, Courtney. Sometimes when I’m having an off day, usually it’s, I stayed up late for some reason the night before or I didn’t get enough sleep or something like that, and things can sort of just be starting off late or behind or tired.

[00:08:49] Joel: Mm-hmm. And

[00:08:50] Blake: I think what helps me, I literally had this, this morning, where my normal routine time started later, and what I did is I just went through the motions of it even though I shrunk the activity time very small. Because even just doing it- Yeah … like, I, I literally d- went to the gym so late. I had time for, I think, one, like, two exercises.

[00:09:14] I w- I was in my car longer than I was at the gym probably. But it was just the ha- like, I wanted to reinforce that and just to, hey, I went there, I came back. And, you know, bef- before we started our day recording podcasts and stuff, normally I’d have more time getting everything ready and some time to do some meditation.

[00:09:32] I literally, I set a timer for 90 seconds on my phone just to sort of have 90 seconds worth of meditation time. And so I think that’s, to me, a small win is- Taking maybe what you would normally do that would feel like a win and just saying, “Hey, even though I can’t do it all out, I can do a little bit.”

[00:09:50] Right. “And that little bit will, will put me in the right direction.”

[00:09:54] Verbs: Yeah. And I think I’m with Blake on that, is, is just small things going into the day to where at least it’s like, okay, I was at least aware enough and capable of at least accomplishing the process of making coffee or, uh, or just even itemizing what the daily big three should look like, knowing, okay, I’m setting myself up so I at least know what I can focus on today.

[00:10:16] So those small wins, I think, really help gain the, the little bit of momentum that you may need to really kind of get into the rhythm of the day if need be.

[00:10:40] Blake: Which leads us to the second tip, reconnect with your rituals. Courtney, you had mentioned about setting the, the big three, how maybe you’re already in the habit of doing that. When you’re feeling off, rituals matter more than ever because the idea of a ritual is it’s something that puts you in a mental, emotional, even physical state without a lot of effort because you’ve built this habit.

[00:11:08] You’ve sort of automated the practice, just like, you know, uh, brushing your teeth and getting dressed in the morning feels automatic, or driving to your office feels automatic. A ritual can become an automated way to go from feeling totally out of sorts and off to feeling more like yourself Courtney and Virbs, we talk about four primary rituals, but when you’re having an off day, which, which of those four do you find yourself leaning into, uh, or utilizing to sort of help you get back, back on track?

[00:11:45] And, and how does, how does that flow for you?

[00:11:47] Courtney: The one I probably is the easiest for me is the one that I lean into when I feel off, and that’s my workday startup.

[00:11:55] Blake: Mm-hmm.

[00:11:56] Courtney: Um, I feel like I’m just in such a great practice of that, um, that it feels more intuitive. I wanna say the one that I probably should lean into the most is, uh, my morning ritual, but u- usually that involves, like, working out and getting up earlier, and those things are, are harder for, for me, you know, on an off day.

[00:12:21] Marissa: Mm-hmm.

[00:12:22] Courtney: Um, and so usually that, my morning ritual gets, like, compressed. But my workday startup, if I, I wanna leave that as close to what I do every day so that everything that follows it feels like, okay, we are, we’re… Like, this train is back on track, um, and the work can flow from there. Uh, now, do I wish, you know, that I still got my Peloton workout on, you know, when I had only slept two hours?

[00:12:48] I do, but that’s, it’s just not realistic, and I think there are times where, you know, life happens.

[00:12:54] Verbs: Yeah. Yeah, and I think for me, um, normally if I’m having an off day, it’s just, it’s probably due to a lack of sleep or an interruption of sleep. And so what becomes important is really that evening ritual of saying, “Okay, I just need to prep myself for this next day, make sure I go to bed at a decent time.”

[00:13:11] Mm. And not, like, not feel like, all right, well, let me just end the day watching a movie or something like that ’cause I’m just gonna be more tired, and it’s gonna compound. So normally it’s just getting a good, a good rest in the evening and make sure everything else, I’m walking down into that evening ritual and getting some good s- some good rest.

[00:13:29] Courtney: All right. So that, uh, it’s a good, um, good segue to our next tip, which is to cut yourself some slack. I mean, I talk about having grace with ourselves a lot, um, on this podcast. Yeah. But just like we were talking about with, you know, it, it really is not practical for me to go do a 45-minute Peloton ride after I’ve slept two hours.

[00:13:53] I don’t think anybody in the world would be like, “Yeah, that’s, that’s a good usage of, uh, what you should be doing.” Uh, the same way we wouldn’t, you know, expect, uh, you know, s- a runner that was sore, uh, to go set, uh, their personal record. And, you know, it’s just not feasible even for ourselves. Like, if we think about our work as, like, our performance, like an athlete, it’s just not realistic to expect of ourselves that we’re gonna have our highest, most productive days on our off days.

[00:14:25] Now, again, hopefully these tips help, you know, salvage some of that where you are still productive. Um, but give yourself, you know, grace. Mm-hmm. Give yourself the ability to say like, “Yeah, I only slept two hours last night. Um, I’m gonna do everything I can to get this train back on the track, but I’m probably not gonna…

[00:14:46] It’s not gonna be the most productive day of all time.”

[00:14:48] Verbs: Yeah.

[00:14:49] Blake: I think it’s helpful to renegotiate your commitments as a form of cutting yourself some slack. So if you recognize, hey, crap hit the fan, or I’m c- completely exhausted because some emergency happened last night or, or, or whatever happened. Yeah.

[00:15:05] If you can, look at your calendar, and maybe you had this big three plan for the day already that you set the day before, or you had some meetings in place. Figure out what can go. What could be rescheduled? Which of those meetings could be put off till tomorrow? Uh, what things from even, even the big three, maybe there are some things that actually don’t absolutely have to be there.

[00:15:28] And with other people and with yourself, try to underpromise, uh, because that’s a, that’s a good way to create some buffer for what will likely be a, a less than optimal productive day from you

[00:15:44] Verbs: Sure. And I think that’s important just to, again, w- part of having grace with yourself is realizing and acknowledging, “Hey, I’m not at 100% today, and I’m no less of who I am if I have to dial back on my big three or renegotiate some of those commitments.”

[00:16:01] I just gotta set myself up, you know, one, to get through the day and until I get back into a, a normal rhythm. Tip number four is take care of your needs. Take care of your needs. And I have, I think, what I feel like is a great example, uh, for this tip as we’re kind of coming out of this 2020 Tokyo Olympics.

[00:16:20] Mm-hmm. The big discussion was Simone Biles, right? Now, I know a lot of people had to say whatever they had to say when she, um, backed out of a few of the events, but to me, this is a prime example of taking care of your needs, right? Simone Biles is a world-renowned, uh, gymnast who’s won multiple medals. So if she says, “Hey, I’m not at 100% today.”

[00:16:43] Um, I remember I read an article about this, uh, this thing I guess in the gymnastic world, it’s called air awareness. So if she’s saying, “Hey, here’s what’s ahead of me in these routines, and I feel like I’m not feeling right when I’m in the air and doing these twists and all that,” for her to say, “I’m just gonna pull out,” and, and her stepping away or out of that event could have been life-saving for her, at least physically, mentally, and emotionally, probably.

[00:17:07] But having that awareness to say, “I need to take care of my mental health in this area, even if that means pulling out of an Olympic world competition,” you know, if that has to be done, then so be it. Um, but I felt like that was maybe an example for not only athletes that were there participating, as I’m sure some of them took some of those same steps to just regain their mental health in that situation where it’s a high-pressure situation.

[00:17:29] But I think that’s a lesson that we could also take away of just saying, “Hey, acknowledge this is what’s going on. Let me go take care of my need before I get back to my normal performance pace.”

[00:17:40] Blake: I think there’s a mindset shift that needs to happen for you to take care of yourself. You, you bring up Simone Biles, and the thought crossed my mind.

[00:17:48] She is a multi gold medalist. She’s already a champion, and sometimes I think it’s hard, uh, you know, I think about my own self, it’s hard for me to take time or resources to take care of a need or even ask what do I need that I’m not getting and take care of myself. Mm-hmm. If I’m in this head space of I’m a failure, you know, or I’m behind and s- everything’s gonna fall apart, like, I think if you have a, uh, a view of yourself of, you know, I am a productive person, I can accomplish the most important things in my day, and wh- whatever your highest contribution is to your job or whatever else, to be like, no, like, I am successful and it b- it’s because I’m a successful person that I can afford- Mm-hmm

[00:18:40] you know, Simone Biles isn’t done. You know, not only is she a champion, she knows she’s a champion to be. She literally medaled, like, 15 minutes later, you know, which was just remarkable, you know, coming, coming back.

[00:18:52] Courtney: Well, I mean, we- we’ve talked about her as a champion. She’s not just a champion, she is the greatest-

[00:18:56] Blake: Yeah, she’s the GOAT.

[00:18:57] Yeah …

[00:18:57] Courtney: you know, gymnast of all time. This is, like, the best of the best of the best.

[00:19:02] Blake: Absolutely. So I, I think we can get into sort of specific techniques for taking care of yourself, but I do think that part of it starts with that just mentality that you are, are, are really worth it, and it’s your highest leverage move a lot of times.

[00:19:18] Like, there’s a, a pillow and a mat- Right … right next to me, and sometimes I know, yes, there’s 10 emails I gotta send, but I’ve got a call in 15 minutes, and the best thing I can do is to serve that person. That’s my highest leverage. I need to just rest my eyes for 10 minutes, and it kinda communicates some self-worth.

[00:19:36] You kinda can’t take that step, I guess, unless you have that.

[00:19:42] Verbs: So the good news is you don’t have to feel stuck on your off days. You can balance productivity with self-kindness by starting with small wins, reconnecting with your rituals, cutting yourself some slack, and taking care of your needs. Any final thoughts for our Focus On This listeners? Courtney, I’ll bounce it to you.

[00:20:01] Courtney: Yeah. I, I think it’s just a good reminder to know that this happens to everyone. Uh, we talked about Simone Biles, uh, we’ll throw Michael Hyatt into to the mix here. We’ll throw, um, I was gonna say Elon Musk, but, you know, whoever it is that you think has just, like, done it, you know, has just, like, arrived, um, they have off days too, and probably more than, than you would even think.

[00:20:32] So I think, uh, having grace for yourself is really important, and then hopefully some of these tools, uh, you know, when you, when you get to one of those off days, if you can have these in mind, um, it can really propel you, uh, especially into the next day, um, really getting that momentum, getting things back on track.

[00:20:52] And then the next day is, okay, now I am, I’m performing at my best. Sure. You know, I am doing the work, I’m contributing in the way that I have been hired to do. So hopefully that’s a good reminder for everybody listening.

[00:21:07] Verbs: Well, thank you for joining us on Focus On This. This is the most productive podcast on the internet, so please share it with your friends and remember to join our Full Focus Planner community right there on Facebook.

[00:21:19] We’ll be here next week with another great episode, but until then, stay focused.

[00:21:28] Yeah.